Quickie morning post and honesty

This week has been a busy one. I had training in Suquamish yesterday and forgot I had class after but I went even though I really DID not want to go. The training was great, short, but insightful. Then the ICW Director took us to the casino for a buffet lunch. I wasn't so vegan there because I have not let go of my love of salmon and I had this amazing cream of spinach soup that really was delightful. Then I came home from class last night and was starving and my smoothies didn't look appealing. I heated up vegan sausages and smothered them in maple syrup. Yes this is why the weight lingers.... And now I'm up ready for another full day of training.. Connor is up literally hanging on my skirt... Breakfast and lunch are provided at the training so I'm committing myself to smoothies starting tomorrow morning. I only have supervision tomorrow for a little bit but then a full day of training on Friday and then I have to go pick up the kids in Mill Creek for the weekend. ... aghhhh had some more thoughts but now Connor is pulling my arm yelling "mommy, help." Off I go. :)

Smoothie overload and motivations and pondering various things....

Dinner consists of my 3rd smoothie today:

-So Delicious raspberry coconut yogurt (amazing steal from Grocery outlet, 50 cents a pop as opposed to $2)

-Raw meal protein powder

-Kale-

-Unsweetened almond milk

(So I started this post 2 hours ago. LOL......)

After dinner for the boys, a couple of shows and a couple of books read, I'm finally attempting to get back to this post. 

I've been trying to think long and hard about my inability to complete things I set out for myself.. I've tried several approaches:

1.) Being militant and strict-however I have a bit of a rebel in me and I sabotage myself in some sort of way

2.) Being forgiving and lenient- which then leads to all out binges and splurges

I've tried setting goals, thinking that I would blog or journal to help work through feelings but inevitably after a few days I lose interest and left life consume my time. I'm kind of at a loss as how to keep on track. I've come to the realization (having watched the scale not go down in a very long time) that I am an over eater. I am a night eater. I eat even when not hungry. I've thought about possibly seeing a counselor, joining a group???? I'm just not sure, I've joined several and then promptly did nothing with several raw vegan groups.  

I'm just not sure what it is that will finally get me back on track to where I want to be.

Every time I complain about not having anything to wear, Oliver tells me to buys pants that fit but silly me still wants to buy the size I wore pre-pregnancy and I yearn to wear all those clothes I have boxed up. 

But I'm going to let my optimistic personality over take me and convince myself that "trying" again will work, that I will continuously blog and I will set realistic goals for myself. 

I just feel weird now, blogging about this. And I have a ton of thoughts but I'm not eloquent enough to express them. Maybe it is the fact that Connor is screeching like a little banshee and asking for "boobs." 

Hmmmm. 

That's it for now. In other news, my beautiful awesome daughter Hanna turned 10 today. It is so cool to watch her blossom into a super sweet young lady. We're going to have a skating party for her on Saturday... good times. 

I'm battling a slight headache right now, I've only had smoothies and tea today. And no its not crazy. I always check my calories and its a healthy number. I'm not by any means starving. In fact I'm not hungry. Not physically.. I just want to wind down with munchies after putting the boys to bed and watch a show= dangerous combination= no weight loss. 

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Been a while....

It's pretty frustrating to have reviewed my journal and not seen the scale go down in a very.. (very) long time. Ok Ok to be honest it may have gone up by like 2lbs. YIKES! I start each day with the best of intention..... and do really GREAT .. most of the day. For instance today looked like this:

Breakfast: Water, smoothie (Frozen mango, coconut water, raw cacao, matcha green tea powder, kale, spinach)

Snack: My special lemonade:  Water, juice of 1 lemon, apple cider vinegar, and stevia and a drop of grapefruit essential oil

Did 50 mins of Family Yoga (Connor likes to hop on our backs when we're in dogdog)

Lunch: Amy's Thai Coconut Tom Kha Phak with fresh celery and tomato chopped into it. Pretty damn good.

Dinner: Coconut milk blended with romaine and spinach and stevia. Romaine leaves stuffed with roasted red pepper hummus and sprinkled with raw pumpkin seeds.

Then all hell broke loose and my family came over to take us to Toy's R' Us and we then went to Krispy Kreme and I had 1 doughnut unglazed. THEN I came home and ate a bowl of leftover spaghetti that I made for the kiddos and I'm talking a HEFTY bowl. So here I sit here with a owie tummy and lots of remorse and guilt. Blah. So I'm slugging back the water and gonna give it a go tomorrow. AGAIN. :)

Where did the Summer go?

I have been very neglectful of this blog. So I'm going to cheat and post a bunch of pics to highlight the end of our summer. Fall quarter just started up this week for me, so back to school and practicum. My eating has been..... hmmmmm... mostly good. LOL. I will do another post soon on my workouts which have been pretty darn good the last 2 weeks. Without further ado: (in random order too lol)

Sisters at NW trek July 2012

Ollie's Bday Martha Lake August 2012

Oregon trip August 2012

Carrot juice boy

Lots of watermelon this summer

Does this need a caption? I think not.

Yes I am stepping on my kid. 2012

The gang 2012

In between soccer games August 2012

Some beach in Oregon LOL August 2012

Playing with Lola

Ollie is now 12 yo. Martha Lake

Daddy and Connor

NW Trek

Homework buddies

Juice again!

Plenty of time at the park

Children's museum visit

Shanelle and I did the zipline obstacle course. The most thrilling thing!!!

My boy. Straight from the tap. Good stuff.

Yes sister duck faces.

Go Raptors!

Chuck E. Cheese silliness

Yes thats my kid. :)

I'm completely in love with...

CUCUMBERS! Glorious cucumbers. I got a really good deal at Fred Meyers on a box of them. So here are some of the top uses I have found for them:

1) Juice. Juice and more juice. They give any juice you make some volume and a refreshing taste. It pairs well with anything really. But I'm very fond of it with lemon and romaine and maybe some ginger.

2.) Cucumber noodles! Oh my oh my. I'm so geeky to be this excited about cucumber noodles. I saw a recipe on one of the many blogs I stalk haunt read. It was for a zucchini and I've had those before and loved it as noodles but since I have a plethora of cucumbers I gave it a peel whirl

• So first I peel it (and toss peel because it wasn't organic)
• Then I peel again.. happy happy fettucine like noodles
• Do not peel all the way down as you will get to the seeds
• Toss with a dab of your favorite dressing ( I used Annie's Goddess dressing)
• Throw in some extras like raw hemp seeds
• Now I find the noodles are a bit wet, I suppose you could try to squeeze out the excess fluid but I like it like that and you're getting all the hydration!

3.) Don't throw out the seeded part of the cucumber after peeling because you can make Cucumber water. Throw in a mason jar with water and some lemon slices, put in fridge and VOILA. Yum. Perfect summer time hydration.

So it took cucumbers to energize me to blog. I've had many thoughts about posting but it kept getting pushed out of the way. We had Hanna and Ollie here with us for over a week and we LOVED IT. It felt so good to have them more than a weekend. So suffice it to say things were buuuusssssyyy in this household. Here is a glimpse of our lives lately:

morning snuggles with daddy

This honestly is our morning, EVERDAY! Connor gives lots of hugs and kisses to us both.

Kissy boys indeed

My wonderful kiddos

Cheeze!

At Chambers Creek Park

Words can not describe my love of this awesome pic

Squish

He wore his brother out!

Heavy duty bubble-esque smoothie

I'm taking my gram to the doctor today so I wanted a very heavy filling smoothie and here is what I created:

• Frozen banana
• Spirulina manna
• Almond butter
• MSM
• Flax seed meal
• Stevia
• Vanilla soy milk (and water because I ran out)
• And the secret ingredient------> Dessert Quinoa (ab out a 1/4 cup worth)

I made the dessert quinoa last night: Just cook it with vanilla soy milk, vanilla extract, and some stevia and ba-da bing, ba-da BOOM! Yum. 


And even though my day started, reluctantly, at 630 here is what I have to make my day ever so beautiful. The sun is shining and I'm feeling good. I'm down to 127 lbs. Slow and steady wins the race!

Parsley-riffic

Parsberry (Parsley-blueberry) Smoothie:

1 cup of vanilla soy yogurt

1/2 frozen banana

Huge handful of frozen blueberries

Couple handfuls of parsley

Tsp. MSM

Vanilla extract

Water 

 Serious yumminess. It is refreshing and filling

Another version I made this morning was:

1 red banana

Frozen strawberries

chia seeds

parsley

flax seed meal

water

 

 

Our weekend in pictures and a smoothie recipe

I dunno whats going on with the hair, please ignore

 Today's awesome smoothie:

• Banana
• Frozen strawberries
• MSM
• Stevia
• PARSLEY!

Oliver and Ollie